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Thursday, January 17, 2008

Tie Dye Dreams



I've been a sad puppy.
I suppose that the combination of loosing my job
and my companion of 11 years (my kitty Max, for those who don't know) has taken its toll. Combine that with grey winter skies and - there yah go- Instant Depression.

I keep getting interviews for jobs that I don't want. I feel guilty if I don't go on the interview, yet I know that the position is not something that is suitable to my life or me. In the first place, if the dress code is business professional, I'm screwed. I have never been a business professional kind of girl. I was actually in scrubs most of my working life, then after that it's been a business casual environment and that's the way I've liked it. I don't own a single pair of high heels or pantyhose. Can't even walk in those toe crunchers! I own exactly three dresses, one of which could be considered business professional, however it does not fit me and hasn't for a couple of years. I have two pairs of dress pants. One of them needs to be thrown away or taken to a tailor. Now how exactly am I supposed to show up for this business professional interview in my tattered and worn out t-shirts and expect to get hired? Sigh. I need to do some shopping. That's probably mostly depression wanting to vent via shopping however appropriate clothing for the interview process would actually be nice. The Wifester doesn't want to spend a single dime on anything extra until I get a job. I can't get a job without having some presentable attire. Problem is I'm not a fashion queen - not by any means. I spent my formative years wearing tie-dye t-shirts and floral print ankle length skirts and Birkenstocks. I'd still wear them if I had them, from the tie-dye to the birkies. I'm most comfortable in jeans or sweats propped up in front of a canvas smearing paint everywhere. No need for a suit when you're creating art!
Is it any wonder that almost every piece of clothing that I own has paint on it? I suppose I could go to the grocery store and get a job as a cashier along with all of the teenagers and college kids. But really, come on. Is it seriously that desperate yet? I really want to spend the next few months getting web master certified. It wont take me long. I'm half way there already. Then I could concentrate more fully on a career not just some job after that. In the meanwhile if something comes along I could take it but focus my attention and efforts to getting the certifications needed first and foremost. This would do a few things for the situation: 1. allow me to work in a creative field that I have an aptitude for and an interest in 2. increase my earning potential by at least double 3. boost my confidence and add power to my resume.
Ugh, you see my conundrum don't you?
So, in the midst of all of this, my need to clean and organize has taken on new heights. I actually organized and cleaned my cleaning supplies. Lined them up and faced them out on the shelf as though I were still a retail store clerk.
I even got on my hands and knees and scrubbed a stain on the carpet that has been driving me nuts. I'm ready to tackle the "Back Room". The Back Room is always referred to as an entity in and of itself. The name Back Room is always said somewhat under the breath and in a lower than normal pitch. That room holds among other things old clothes that need to be thrown out or donated, art supplies, old computers that need to be recycled, and a million as of yet unpacked boxes from my bachelorette apartment. I'm thinking that if I haven't needed those things in those boxes by now, I probably don't need them and they can just go away. Of course the guest bedroom needs some help now too. the closet in there is full of clothes of Macey's that I'm pretty sure she hasn't worn in at least 5 years.
Either way I go, I've got my work cut out for me.


Maximillion, Maximus, Maxwell House 1996-2007








1 cookies cracked:

Mary Stebbins Taitt said...

OH, losing a beloved kitty is SO sad. As far as losing a job, well, it's hard to lose income, but whether the job is sad to lose depends on the job.

I wish you sunny skies, a wonderful new job, and great loving memories but a lessening of grief.