No More Empty Fortune Cookies!

Friday, July 27, 2012

We've Got 99 Problems, and the Chic is One

So this whole Chic-fil-A thing has me thinking.
I mean, I keep hearing people say they don't understand why we would be surprised by how they feel about gays and gay marriage, after all, they are a religious company. Well, I know plenty of religious people and Christian based companies that don't support Chic-fil-A's views and don't donate to such hate-filled groups like Chic-fil-A does. And I don't know of anyone who is "surprised" by any of this. In fact, those of us in the politically active segment of the gay community have been boycotting Chic-fil-A for years. YEARS!
Funny how only now, in an election year, do our actions get noticed by the mainstream.
Funny how only now does Chic-fil-A come out and admit to their donations those groups.
Funny how only now do our straight allies voice their opinions and take a stand along side of us.
We've been telling you and anyone else who would listen for half a second about Chic-fil-A and their endorsement of hatred in our country. We've been asking for years to stop contributing to their profits which get spent on donating to groups who want to repeal our right to marry in the few states that we've gained that right, and prevent us from being able to marry in the rest of the states. They have actively worked to restrict the rights of an entire segment of the population based solely on their very skewed belief system that says that we are less than, not good enough, and abominations.
I am even more perplexed at my fellow GLBT people who say things like, "I'm not gonna stop eating Chic-fil-A. What's the point? Just because I don't support their beliefs doesn't mean I have to stop eating there. My $5 isn't going to make any difference to them." or "But I like their food." It would be one thing if the company simply said, "We believe gays/lesbians don't deserve the same rights as the rest of us." They certainly have the right to that belief, and I wouldn't feel so passionately about not contributing to their profits. But the fact is that they donate money, lots and lots and lots of money to groups and organizations that fight against the gay rights movement. And to put it all into perspective, your $5 combined with every GLBT and true GLBT supporter's $5 actually WILL make a difference in the pocket book of the Chic-fil-A's owners. But more importantly, because hurting their bottom line is not the point, every $5 you spend at Chic-fil-A is another $5 going toward contributions to those political groups, groups with strong affiliations to our law-makers none the less, who are actively working toward restricting your rights. So the point is that by eating at Chic-fil-A you are actively donating to groups who seek to oppress you. It's like buying the gun, the shovel, the plastic tarp, and the rope and handing it over to your murderer.
And if you are not GLBT, but you have friends and/or family who is GLBT and you believe that they should have the right to marry the person they love, the right to adopt and raise children who so desperately need a family to love them, you believe they have the right not to be fired from their jobs just because they are GLBT, then you are being hypocritical by continuing to patronize Chic-fil-A.
So you may SAY you support your GLBT friends/family, but in actuality, you are actively donating to the movement to criminalize, marginalize, and revoke and suppress the basic human rights of the very people you claim to support.
If this is the case, please STOP saying you support us. Because you don't.


Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Of Spasmodic Gallbladders and Potential Kidney Stones

I'm finally feeling back to (almost) normal. If we can call me normal in any respect...
Sunday evening it all started. The pain, the nausea, the chills. I thought I was having another gallbladder attack. It starts with this dull ache across my upper back, just under my shoulder blades.  That dull ache gets stronger and stronger over the course of a couple of hours. Then I get nauseated and develop a terrible, hot, radiating pain under my right rib cage. That one happens in waves and goes on for several hours. I vomit, and vomit, and vomit some more. The pain waxes and wanes for hours on end. Sometimes it stops pretty abruptly after I puke. Sometimes it seem to intensify. Sunday night it intensified. I ran out of the muscle relaxers (Dicyclomine) that the E.R. gave me when they told me they thought it was my gallbladder being spasmodic. Figures I'd have spazoid innards. So I dug through the medicine cabinet and found some Phenergan that I had left over from something a few years ago. Yep, the date on the prescription bottle was 2005. I was like the honey badger at that point, I didn't give a shit. I took it and hoped against hope that it would help the nausea and if nothing else, let me sleep. And sleep I did. I still felt that awful pain in my sleep, but I slept.
The pill the ER doctor had given me was much more effective, it actually helped the pain, and it helped within 15 or 20 minutes. But alas, without insurance I can't afford another $2,000 trip to the E.R. just to be sent home with $50 pills because they can't do surgery on me since I don't have 20K cash and I don't have insurance. And without insurance I can't get a regular doctor to see me because when they run a credit check to see if I'll be able to pay their bill, it comes back negative since I've had financial struggles over the last few years...You know, the same issues I've dealt with in the past when I've tried to see doctors, like for my eyes and my seizures...
So I endure these episodes and try to hold on until either November of 2013 when I am finally eligible for MediCare under Disability rules, or 2014 when ObamaCare kicks in and I can shop for insurance on the private market.
Either way, I have a long ways to go before I can seek treatment for this mysterious issue.
Well, back to Sunday night's episode. It lasted on into Monday morning, when I felt like I had been hit by a semi truck. Oh I slept, but I hurt, too. Then all day Monday I battled this recurring pain, this dull back ache. This general feeling of unease. When I'd stand up to stretch my back, I'd get really dizzy. When I'd sit up it felt like I was being sawed in half. When I laid down I couldn't find a comfortable spot. I was miserable. I shook. I trembled. I'll admit it, I even cried.
The Wifester offered to take me to the ER when she arrived home from work, but knowing we'd be there all night and she had to get up and go to work the next morning and knowing we can't afford the bill, and knowing all that stuff, I declined. Late Monday night, early Tuesday morning something strange happened. I really had to pee again, and when I did there was some blood in my urine. But immediately after that the pain was gone. Poof. Just gone. The next few times I went, there was less and less blood, and by mid day Tuesday, it was all gone. I still had an ache running across my belly. But more like a muscle achyness vs. the general achyness of the night prior. I was extremely exhausted, and still feeling like I'd been hit by  truck, but that pain, dizziness, and nausea was finally gone. Except for a splitting headache, but I think that may have been due to not eating in over 24 hours and not drinking much and not having any caffeine. The Wifester and I simultaneously had the idea that maybe, just maybe this wasn't a gallbladder attack, but rather a kidney stone passing. We remembered the urine with some blood happening at the ER, too. And a month or so ago when the same thing happened here at home, though the pain lasted less than two days that time. Is it possible that I'm having kidney stones? I suppose. They didn't find any gallstones when they X-rayed me in the ER, so they guessed that it was just my gallbladder having spasms and suggested I find a primary care doctor to follow up with. Well, I've already explained why I haven't done that.
So I wonder, if I am having kidney stone episodes, and I'm enduring them without medical intervention, how long can that go on? Am I doing terrible damage to my ureters and urinary tract? And is that further damage going to complicate things once I finally do have insurance and seek treatment? Seems like it is usually cheaper to catch things and fix them early, rather than waiting until they go on and on and cause more damage. Eh, what else can I do but hold on until those magical dates when the rules of the powers that be kick in and say I am fortunate enough to have health care. I guess we'll find out then what damage has been done. Until then, I am crossing my fingers, toes, an every other part I can muster in hopes that I never have to feel that horrible pain ever again. Now where's that ginormous jug of water? I need to rehydrate.

Sunday, July 15, 2012

Introducing Silly Sally Sue

It's done! It's DONE!
My children's book is finally done and ready for sale :)
This is more of a first years type book, probably more for children under 6.
book cover photo

You can buy a paperback copy directly from my store, or you can go through Amazon.com and buy it in either paperback or in ebook format.
If any of you do happen to buy a copy, do me another big favor and leave feedback and rate it for me, please. That helps me a lot!




Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Of Puppies and Children

It's done! It's done! And it's with the printers now. I'll let you know when it is available for purchase. If you have small children, my little book will be a great bedtime, nap time, or anytime story for them. Especially for kids who love pups, and what kid doesn't love a puppy? I mean, really?

Monday, July 2, 2012

Blind Girl Walking!

So, I decided to go for a walk today. It is significantly cooler out there after last night's rain, and I wanted to take full advantage of the milder temps while they lasted. One thing always strikes me as I walk with my cane. People stare at me a lot. They stop and stare at me as I walk around the trash can in my path well before my cane has tapped it. They stop and stare at me watching the Walk and Don't Walk signs on the street corners. They stop and look at me as they talk in hushed tones to their children.
I don't mind it most days, but sometimes I just want to yell, "You know, I CAN see you!"
I don't think they do know. Or they do know I can see some things and they wonder why I'm using a blind cane.

Here's the thing. While you're out on a walk, you are looking ahead and this is what you see:

Hell, if I'm walking along side of you, you can probably see me, too, can't you? Even when your eyes are focused straight ahead at that cabin door?

Well, while I'm walking right along side of you, this is what I see:


Now, admittedly, the bright lights and flashing, pulsating lights can be quite entertaining at times, they are pretty much constant, and can also be really distracting. 
And notice, I can't see any of that path leading up to the door. I can see the door and some of the cabin, but not much else. And in my eyes, I can barely even tell if it is day or night lighting. In the shade, or even partial shade it may as well be midnight to me. 

I tell you this so that next time you are out and you see a person with a blind cane please try to understand that there are so many levels of blindness, and that lot of times, us "blind" people actually can see you gawking at us. And if you see me tap, tap, tapping my way along the sidewalk, don't wonder why I can see but use the stick. 
Just be glad I'm not behind the wheel of a car!