No More Empty Fortune Cookies!

Monday, March 17, 2008

WWC and How I got the boot from Catholic School

O.K. , so this week's WWC words are "foreign" and "domestic" which was mostly all obtained while I was in one place on Saturday night. Before we get to that, though, I think it's time to elaborate on the story of (insert drum roll here....)

How I came to be a Catholic School Reject

I went to the full on plaid-skirt, saddle oxford shoes, mass every morning, nuns teaching class kind of catholic school. I was one of those kids whose tops of hands were perpetually red and swollen from the ruler slaps. My arms were almost always the essence of cooked spaghetti noodles by the end of the day from being made to stand in a corner holding all of my books in outstretched, crucification style, while silently reciting the Our Father 25 times or a couple dozen Hail Marys. I've always had a penchant for challenging authority, and I suppose catholic school isn't the ideal place for a child with a budding authority defiance disorder. I guess that could be argued, though, because I believe that I actually got quite a bit of successful practice at defying the authority while enrolled at aforementioned catholic school. I was one of two, count us one, two ... kids that dared to steal our parents smokes and give it a try on the daily walk to the local public library down the road after school. . . That's where a lot of us walked to hang out and wait for our parents to get off of work and come pick us up. 7th graders. We were the shit. We got caught stealing root beer from the gas station on the way to that library. Banned from the gas station. Joe Cool and I were quite proud. Everyone else was pissed off and took it upon themselves to remind us daily that stealing is a sin. So is smoking, by the way. We learned that from our goody two-shoes classmates too. None of that got me evicted from the halls of the overtly oppressive, male dominated institution that is catholic school. It was six little words. I still say them today. Sometimes in jest. Sometimes in anger. But usually not quite as naively as they came out that particular day.
scene:
The class is in line for restroom break:
Boys standing silently in single file line to the right.
Girls standing silently in single file line to the left.

Someone (to this day, I don't know who) sneezes...a loud "AAAAHHHCCOOOO"

Me: (instinctively, as I've been trained to) "God Bless You!"

Sister Mary Margret "Silence in the hallway! That's another detention for you, Angie"

now, pay attention here... this is what gets you expelled from catholic school....

Me: "Kiss my ass!" ( with an exaggerated eye roll) that's the first three words...

Sister Mary Margaret "What did you just say to me?"

Me: cleared my throat and then said boldly the final three words that ended my catholic school career "GO TO HELL"


And there you have it. That's my story. Now, I beg you to reconsider sending you child to catholic school.

Ok... now that memory lane has been traveled, lets get to some real fun, the WWC! If you want in on the action, go visit Tink, she'll show yah the ropes.

warning: (my dear had custody of the cherished camera, so again, I was forced to cell phone photo it this week, sorry for the blurry photos! (I need my own damned camera!)

with no further ado, here's my interpretation of "foreign"













for domestic we have...



this is about as domestic as it gets


Macey's favorite beer is brewed in the first brewery in the United States























who was drinking all this wine??


and since I'm half mexican and half german, but born in the USA, I get to go in the category of both domestic and foreign!



so were these...













and were in good company, cuz if you think about it, Lady Liberty is both foreign and domestic too!
Macey took this one when she was being a camera-hog, so I guess I'll forgive her.









That's my mostly drinkable WWC for this week ;) hope you enjoyed it.
Next week's words areT:
Treasure
and
Junk


Stop by Tink's if you want to join the fun!








16 cookies cracked:

Jay said...

That's all it took to get kicked out? Dang, that would only be one day detention at my high school. LOL ;-)

Love the pics. I did the domestic and foreign wine thing too.

Karen said...

I am product of 13 years of Catholic school. I recall getting a little tap with the almighty ruler back in the day. Though I never told a nun to "go to hell". LOL.

I also learned quickly, never come home and tell your parents that Sister Mary Charles hit you at school. Your parents will ask you what you did to deserve it and you'll probably get another punishmnent for misbehaving in school.

No More Empty Fortune Cookies said...

Jay- to be fair, it was a culmination of events leading up to that one seemingly benign incident that induced my expulsion. But yeah, its fun to say that I got kicked out of catholic school for telling a nun to "Kiss my ass and go to hell" ;)

Karen- my deepest sympathies to you...do you still wake up with that just been slapped on the wrist feeling? And yes, very good reminder... NEVER tell mom and dad that the nuns got you, cause that only led to a double whammey at home!

Tink said...

Eh. Catholic school is for wimps anyway... ;)

I love your pouty picture! The one of the SOL is cool too. And hey, did that wine bottle say Fucky? Hahaha. I'm such a 12 yr old boy.

moo said...

what a rebel. ;)

wonder what would get you kicked out of catholic school THESE days?

gr said...

alright no more fortune cookies, nice to meet you, thanks for the visit to potsblog!!!!

Ginni Dee said...

You've got some great shots there!

:)

R.E.H. said...

Hmmm... I had to work so much harder to get kicked out of school - it took me a year and a half to accomplish what you did in less than a minute... you put me to shame ;)

Lovely pictures. Quite suddenly, I feel like having a beer again...

No More Empty Fortune Cookies said...

Tink-"for wimps"- I agree! and yes, that is Fu-Ki wine, look for it, buy it, drink the whole bottle, it's divine! I like mine mixed with with Korbel...but it stands alone just fine too. And best part is, after a few glasses, you get to giggle uncontrollably over the name of the wine you're drinking! YAY!

Moo - I shiver to think what is required to get kicked out these days...
I did my part to be the rebel as best I could.

gr - the pleasure was ALL mine! you gots talent!

Ginny - thanks so much!

r.e.h. - ok, so now I'll be expecting a "How r.e.h. got the boot from school" story over at the ramblings of a madman page, fair's fair, ;) quid pro quo, you know... and honestly, that really was just the straw that broke the camel's back, or should I say that broke the nun's faith? lol

Joel said...

My boarding school (when I was in 8th grade) sounds a more like yours! I left it after the 10th grade :)

g-man said...

Excellent photos!!! FUNNY story. My sister tried really hard to get kicked out of Catholic school, who knew it was so easy. :)

The Mama Bear said...

Great pics for WWC, mine are up at The Cafe.
Good thing I left Catholic School in 2nd grade or I am sure I would have been expelled eventually myself.

Reb said...

Good pictures. Man those nuns are hard! Yes, it makes for a good story though.

Chatty said...

This if fun - Tink's WWC is introducing me to a lot of cool new blogs. Love the Catholic school story! Also love your "Lady Liberty" - and I did Guinness as one of my foreign offerings today, too. Now, having looked at all your beautiful beverages, I feel like having a drink!

No More Empty Fortune Cookies said...

Joel - glad you only had to endure 1 years!

G-man- thanks! Who-knew? that's what I was thinking!

MamaBear- Glad you escaped too! I'll mosey on over and check you pix out!

reb- yes, nuns are tough cookies!

chatty- nice to "meet" you, come on back anytime! the Lady Liberty was actually shot by my snookums, Macey, but it is a nice shot, eh? This weeks word challenge made me thirsty too!

Newt said...

Wow, those are fantastic. And I am now SO thirsty after looking at all the WWC's today.