You never see an obese 70 year old

After a couple of years eating a mostly plant based diet, with some chicken and fish now and then, and regular use of dairy, The Wifester and I decided last month to go all vegetarian, she's actually doing vegan, that's a bit much for me right now, but maybe I'll try to aim for it in the future *baby steps*. I'm not sure I can give up cheese, though. Mmmmmm cheese...
But I digress.

This all came about after watching Forks Over Knives. If you haven't seen it, it's quite compelling! I even switched from dairy milk to coconut milk for my coffee. I'm pleasantly surprised by that one!

Anyway, I am really struggling with losing weight, even on the plant based diet. And, I'm embarassed to admit, that I actually struggle to get enough exercise because my weight and size makes it so difficult for me to have the stamina I had even just a year ago. I am considering weight loss surgery (lap band).

Even on the mostly plant based diet, I've fluctuated over the last year, losing 30 lbs, then gaining 45...

I'm 41 years old now, and I've struggled with my weight my entire life. I was a fat toddler, a fat grade schooler, a fat middle and high schooler, and now I'm a fat adult. I worry that won't live long enough to be a fat senior citizen.

I feel like if I could just lose enough weight to have more energy and more mobility, I would be able to exercise more and help myself lose more weight. I struggle with the guilt of "taking the easy way out" on this, but I also feel like my life is dependent upon me being healthier and losing this dangerous weight. What are your honest thoughts on that?

Renewed Dedication

So I've been very lackadaisical about blogging for the past year. Save for the sporadic posts here and there, and a chime in with a kiss and a promise to keep up better. Sorry about that.
The good news is that I finished school! That was the biggest hindrance to my writing time and creative flow. I'm so relieved to have finally accomplished that task, I can't even tell you!
I don't even care too much that I'm going to lose my sight and never fully be able to utilize the skills I learned. I mean, I care, but learning them was worth the time and effort. And I can still do what I can do until that day comes. Besides, it really has more to do with a self-satisfying sense of accomplishment. Does that sound awful? After all of my enthusiastic starts, only to be eclipsed by my seemingly inevitable lack of follow through, I'm just super stoked to actually have completed the course work and earned a for real and for true, accredited degree.

Anywhoodle, what I'm saying here is that I miss you! I miss my blog! And I miss blogging on my blog. I'm making some changes now, and coming back to my blogging self is one that I am committed to. I have to admit, blogging is a sort of therapy for me. It's cathartic. It's stress relieving. It's mood altering.

Another change I have committed to has been exercise. I know, I know...but this time I have stuck to it since Thanksgiving! That's a record for me. I'll keep you posted on the progress. I already notice clothes fitting much better. I got into a denim skirt that I haven't been able to wear in over a year! I figure if I'm gonna go blind, and deal with epilepsy, the least I can do for those around me and for the eventual guide dog is to get below the obese level, preferably below the moderately overweight level, and hopefully into a weight zone that is much easier to be dealt with by those around me when I'm incapacitated. Wish me luck!

Promoting P.A. Bees and other hot topics...

So, first things first, Wifester's mom, who is a published author and poet ( P.A. Bees) and all around fabulous gal, has a newly budding blog, and I wanted to be the first to buzz it in your ear! So what are you doing still here? Buzz on over, and check out the Bee's Blog!! But come on back here when you're done ;)

Next. When will people learn to keep guns out of homes with children? A 12 year old girl was shot in the head, apparently by her 11 year old playmate, while playing with a gun that had been tucked between the mattresses of his parent's bed.
I can't even keep my brain wrapped around this topic, it's so sad and so upsetting. People say guns don't kill people, people kill people...Well, I'm pretty sure that had this particular gun not been in the house, this little girl would be home playing today, not laying in the hospital fighting for her life with a bullet hole in her forehead. I say it's people with guns that kill people. Rarely is it either independantly.

Next. I saw photos of myself that Wifester took this weekend, and lets just say I've decided to stop eating for oh about the next 6 months, yeah, that otta do it.
Really, though. I know I can't eliminate all food, but ok, I've done away with fast food, I've cut out colas and tea(except 1 Sprite M-F with lunch while I'm at work) and in lieu of bread, I use tortillias. I rarely have pasta, and usually use the George Foreman Grill, I mean, it is the lean, mean, grilling machine, right? We eat mainly lean, boneless, skinless, chicken breasts or tofu or salmon and steamed veggies. I've even stopped adding salt after it's cooked! No poundage lost. So what gives? What the ever loving hell gives? I'm glad Wifester loves me, fat and all. I sure hope I can find a treadmill soon that both fits my budget and my house's square-footage...