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Thursday, January 26, 2017

Lookng for Light in the Midst of Darkness

I've been feeling down and blue lately. The election is a part of that, and it is winter so I get less sunlight, and that always seems to affect me, and then there's my sight...

I know to expect a constant decline. I know it is, as my medical record so kindly states,
"a progressive, incurable disease
I know all of this, but I still find it hard to adjust each time I notice my world getting darker and smaller than before.

Colors fade.
Lights dim.
Visual acuity diminishes.
And my positive outlook plummets, even if it is temporary.

I was deep in thought about it all the other night, and I realized that there are parallels between how I feel about what's going on in the world around me politically, and what's going on in the world around me visually.
  • Darkness is slowly encroaching on an ever smaller and smaller world. 
  • The dangers I encounter are growing in number, and I don't always see them before it is too late. 
  • What worked before is inadequate now.
  • I have to constantly remind myself to slow down, look for the safe spots, and then make my way to them slowly, meticulously considering each step and then cautiously advancing, ever onward. Ever forward. 
  • Sometimes the steps I take look foolish to others, and I have to stop caring whether or not they understand my motives. I always strive for my actions to do no harm, to myself or to others. 
  • I'm constantly looking desperately for a glimmer of light to help guide me. 
  • Sometimes I have to create my own light. 
Although I get overwhelmed with the changes and frightened by the darkness, I have to approach it with determination and confidence.

Friends, I'm here to tell you, I will get through my vision loss and thrive in spite of it.

We will get through this dark period in our country's history by adjusting ourselves to our new environment, taking carefully planned steps, and maneuvering ourselves back into that circle of light where we can clearly assess our surroundings, unobstructed by all this darkness.

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